it feels good

so i went to the pot luck dinner at church really i had a great time and i am happy that i have started attending church again.

so im going to church this morning

it will be the first time since prison im going to the lil church that they had chris's memoriol service at

the pastor at that church is in to quite a bit of prison ministry plus it is just a quiet lil church any ways more later

still kinda sick

so im still not over this strep throat i have felt like shit all week long and it is already saturday so if i dont get to feeling better tomorrow then ill be sick at work again

i kick ass

not really but yeah

i made an A on every assignment i turned in last week for english comp 2 so i'm really really happy anyways i also got to see my grandbaby for the first time today it was kinda weird since i'm so young it is my 22 year old step daughters baby well her mom and i are not still together but the kids will stay in my heart forever any ways peace

damn i hate being sick

well i woke up early to get my homework done but i still feel like hell so i think im gonna go back to bed

another friend is dead

another one of my friends past on this week end we were not nearly as close as jay and i although i knew him a lot longer

death is just so final there are no do overs or im sorry's

people just die and if things are left unsaid or un finished

then they stay that way so tell the ones you love how much you love them everyday

a poem one of my ex's wrote

A Drug in this Town
Current mood: miserable
Category: Life

 

There’s a drug in this town that can always be found
If you’ve tried it you’re a fool, it is mean, it is cruel
I can tell you these things because they’re tried and they’re true
And though you can’t see it, it has probably hurt you

They say it takes your money, your teeth, and your fat
But people who’ve been there know it takes more than that
It takes your ambition, your pride, and your heart
It thwarts you purpose in life, your own special part

It’s deceptive; if feels like it may give more than take
But it substitutes real qualities with ones that are fake
Until you no longer can function yourself
And what was once naturally yours, now sits on a shelf

No time for deep thinking, no time for your soul
No time for your spirit to learn and to grow
Your physical body now depends on the drug
Without it all systems move like a slug

Things that happen with people in life that aren’t right
Don’t deal with it, stuff it, keep it in there, hold it tight
Knowing it doesn’t take much to feel back on top
Just snort a quick line, smoke a puff, slam a drop

Your life looks good on the surface above a rotten foundation
Underneath are depression, hopelessness and stagnation
You never see improvement, you never see change
You never move forward, your problems are always the same

It makes you thoughtless and it makes you hard
Life rushes past fast but it leaves you scarred
You’re always so busy, there’s so much to do
But in the end you’ve done nothing and you’re no longer you

So walk away now, far away if you can
Never look back and never give in
Take what’s left of your Self and leave all the strife
And give thanks to God for your precious life