DAY ONE

why can i not get this right, i am calling this day one, actually i have been sober for a couple of days but i was still coming down i started messing with this girl tonya, and before i knew it had been up a couple of days and seriously almost lost everything i have going for me. i broke up with candy last night but now i feel horrible today i never meant to hurt her i just was not feeling it and i wanted to because she is such a great girl and i know she would do anything for me, the thing is she deserves the same i dont want to settle just because she would give me everything i need i need to be able to give that to her as well. to me a marriage is an equal partnership and if i dont feel for her the way she feels for me than it is not really fair to her we have still spoken a couple times today i just do not know what to do