just the cowboy in me

so for years i have said i was gonna ride a bull and this year is the year i think it is august that i can do it i'll have to make sure. my cousin chris said if i did it he would i dont know if he knew that i was for real and it doesn't matter if he rides or not i'm going to

i'm hoping that serena is here when i do it cause one thing i have always been able to count on is her faith in me it is not as strong as my sisters hell no ones is, but with both of them there i bet i get my 8 seconds

i might not make it look good like a cowboy but i'm not looking for a career or a medal just a thrill

so this morning amanda is probably waking up with jeff, wonder if he's gonna tell her how beautiful she is, or if he is gonna carry miah to the potty and let him know that it's alright cause he doesn't like waking up. or if he is gonna take interests in johnathons life, his feelings and desires  his goals and fears

some bitch told me yesterday that i live in the past and that i'm waiting for something i want but cant have

i guess that is true

because i still wake up expecting amanda to be beside me and the boys to be just a room away,, watching cartoons if it's a week end or sleeping soundly monday through friday.

but tell me this how do you not think about it if that is what you put all of yourself into plans dreams and goals

sure i've made new plans set new goals, but the fact is they are still in my dreams

guess that's just the cowboy in me